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“When Saba was with you, did she talk about Lagos Forensic Center by any chance?” Zayaan asked.

 

“La…. yes of course. She had gotten a scholarship from a university to study forensics, and she always said she would work at the Lagos center once she graduated. Why do you ask?” Heena asked and suddenly, Zayaan felt his heart beating the right way again.

 

“Is there perhaps a place she might visit when she felt lonely?”

 

“I’m not sure….. I guess there will be the places that she had listed down on her journal…”

 

“Where is it? The journal?”

 

“It will be in her room. What’s going on, Zayaan?”

 

Heena asked him. Zayaan didn’t answer that question either and instead, asked her to show Saba’s room. Heena showed him the direction to go and Zayaan walked in a fast pace in that direction. Heena looked at him go into the room, puzzled. She thought of asking him more questions, but she changed her mind when she realized that it will be a waste of breath. She sighed, thinking to herself that Zayaan might be having a moment because of the trauma he went through. She walked away, allowing him to engage with Saba’s memories for a little while.

 

But that wasn’t the only plan Zayaan had when he entered the room. For a few minutes he did indulge himself in the memories of Saba. Seeing the neatness of the room, the books on the study table and the indoor plant near the bedside reminded of the daily habits Saba used to have even when she lived with him. She would do a light clean up of her room every day, water the plant in the room and read a book related to forensics while taking notes on a binder book. She would also write on her journal before she went to bed every night telling him that it was everyone’s responsibility to take account of one’s deeds before they are held accountable on the Day of Judgement.

 

She hadn’t changed even a bit. Zayaan thought as he saw two binder books on the study table. Zayaan walked slowly towards it and opened the book on the top. As he had assumed, it had notes on forensics while there were textbooks on that topic in one corner of the table.

 

Zayaan ruffled through the pages before keeping the book aside. He then looked at the blue binder book that was under the book he had just taken. He slowly picked up the book to see a small title written with a black marker. It read, ‘Rethinking my future’.

 

Zayaan flipped the cover page of the book almost hesitantly, knowing what’s in it will hurt him. On the first page, Saba was trying hard to come to terms with the fact that he was no longer a part of her life. Even though they hadn’t divorced, Saba had written about how their relationship had come to an end. She wrote about how Zayaan will be getting married to someone else and that’s what she wished for him too. After some point, it seemed as though she was talking to him directly. Zayaan saw almost the exact words he had heard in his ‘dream’ on that journal.

 

Get married to a beautiful girl from your own ethnicity. That way, you will be safe and happy.

 

Zayaan let out a short sigh as he read those words. He didn’t even read further due to the sadness and a hint of rage he felt at those words. He flipped through the pages to find what he had taken that book for.

 

Before long, Zayaan found what he was looking for and he took pictures of the pages that he needed.

 

“I’ll get going now.” he said as he walked out of the room slightly giving a look at Heena who was coming out of the dining room into the living room.

 

As Zayaan was about to reach the front door, he was compelled to stop as it opened from the other side. He stood stunned when he saw a black man with beard, white shirt, and blue trousers. The man was as shocked as Zayaan too, which led to a moment of silence.

 

“Zayaan…” the man called out his name lovingly, which reassured Zayaan who the man was as he was reminded of that man’s kind demeanor. It was none other than Sameer, who looked at Zayaan with teary eyes.

 

“We didn’t hear from you for so long…. we were so worried about you. How are you now?” Sameer asked.

 

“I’m doing fine, Dad. I’m…. just so sorry for everything that happened. I should have taken better care of Sa…” Zayaan couldn’t bring himself to mention her in front of Sameer. He really felt ashamed of himself at that moment, when he remembered the promise, he had made to Saba’s father. The promise to shower her with love and to always protect her. He couldn’t live up to that word.

 

“Don’t say that Zayaan. It wasn’t your fault. You did your best until you lost your consciousness.” Zayaan felt his heart melting as he heard those words as Sameer patted him on the arm. For a moment, he had thought that the man standing in front of him will not forgive him because of what had happened to his daughter. But their that man was, smiling at him.

 

“In Sha Allah she is in a better place than we are. She had talked about you every single day when she was here. She made dua for you and asked us to make dua for your health too. She would have been extremely happy to see you.” Sameer said those words while smiling and wiping the tears that was going to fall from his eyes.

 

“Wipe your tears for good, Dad. I’m going to do something to make up for the sadness you went through In Sha Allah.” Zayaan had a strong urge to say that there was a possibility of Saba being alive. But at the same time, he was adamant on not hearing anyone doubting that possibility anymore.

 

Sameer looked at Zayaan with a curious look not knowing what he had meant. As Zayaan walked out of the house, Sameer and Heena exchanged looks, wondering what Zayaan was up to.

 

As soon as Zayaan got in the car and turned on the ignition, he took out his phone and looked at the first picture he had taken. Saba had written a name of a garden that she visited on a day she felt sad because of a murder case she worked on. He fed the name of the garden to the GPS of the car and hit on the accelerator.

 

Zayaan went reached the location in no time. He walked into the garden and looked all around it to see Saba. When he couldn’t, he got back in the car and entered the next location to the GPS.

 

Zayaan went from parks to benches on streets, to cafés and restaurants based on what Saba had written on her journal. He was almost about to give up when he got back in the car without finding her even on the 8th location he had gone to. He then took out his phone and swiped through the pictures of the pages, assuming that he had looked through all the pictures he had taken from the journal. He then saw a picture of a very blank page that had only a few lines. He realized that he hadn’t even read those lines thinking that it might be a continuation of thoughts from the previous page. However, as he read those lines at that moment, he was stunned.

Today I missed him too much. So, I visited the Gurara falls. Because it reminds me of the day we first met.

 

At first, Zayaan just sat still looking at those words and then, ended up laughing out of joy. For some reason, he was sure that he would find her there if he went right at that moment. Hence, he happily entered that location into the GPS and began to drive once again, one last time, as he thought to himself.

 

**

 

It was evening and the sun was closer to setting as Zayaan was reaching the Gurara falls. He got out of the car as soon as he reached there and began to look around. The entire area echoes with the sound of the waterfalls and Zayaan smiled involuntarily as it reminded him of the day, he first met Saba too.

 

It did even more so, when he reached the point where he began to see a river into which the waterfalls were flowing into. There were many people at the bank of the river, taking pictures and having picnics. Zayaan looked among the people and kept walking forward, until he reached a spot where there were no people. Well, almost no people except for a woman who was on her knees near the river.

 

Zayaan halted his steps for a little while as his heart fluttered, just like the first day that they had first met. He remembered the smile on her face, her beautiful voice and how she had taken him by surprise as she talked about Jannah out of the blue. He began to take slow steps towards her, crushing the dry leaves with his shoes as he did. The woman near the river didn’t seem to hear that sound though, perhaps because of the overwhelming sound of the waterfalls in the surrounding.

 

Within a few seconds, Zayaan had reached the riverbank. He then saw her face from the side. Though it was only her eyes that were visible to him because of the mask she wore, it was enough for him to be sure that it was her. At the same time, he wondered why she still wore the mask. Was she still trying to hide from everyone? Zayaan thought. He wouldn’t let her do it this time. Not anymore.

 

Zayaan took out his phone from his jeans pocket while still looking at her. She sat still as though she were a statue looking at the flowing water. Zayaan opened the camera from his phone focused the lens on her. Within a few seconds, he tapped the center to capture the picture and just then, the woman looked at his phone’s camera due to the sound of the click. Zayaan felt as though he had lived one moment twice in his life, when he saw the picture of those startled eyes looking at his camera.

 

He then looked at the woman who stood up with a start, just like that day. Zayaan could not help but smile at the scene. Before long, she began to walk away from him. But before she could go further, he spoke.

 

“It’s the same as that day. But I wish this part played a little differently. I wish you wouldn’t walk away from me for once.” Zayaan said as he looked at her. He saw her fists tightening before she spoke.

 

“I’m sorry but I really don’t think we know each other.” she said, in a trembling voice. Zayaan laughed sarcastically.

 

“Why can’t you look at me when you say so, then?” Zayaan asked, provokingly.

 

He saw her turning around at that moment and looking at him with sad eyes that she tried hard to make seem tough. He felt an ache in his chest when he saw those eyes tearing up.

 

“I think it would be best if you walked away right now.” she said.

 

“Walk away? So that I could go back to my miserable life where I’ll be wondering whether my wife is alive or not? So, that I could have those sleepless nights for the rest of my life? Is that why you exchanged yourself in the van with someone else when I had waited for you out there an entire day?” Zayaan asked with a hint of rage.

 

“That’s right! That’s how terrible of a human being I am. That’s how toxic I can be! Doesn’t that give you enough of a reason to walk away?” her voice rose too.

 

“No, it doesn’t! Because I know it must have been hell for you too. I can see that right now in your eyes.” he lowered his voice as he said the last sentence and tears flowed from her eyes as she looked at him.

 

Zayaan could not help but take a step towards her as she broke down. But she abruptly took even more steps backwards wiping her tears.

 

“You can’t come close to me. They will find out soon. Your mom and my brother. They were behind your accident too. And it was all because I was in your life. My brother looks at every one of my moves even here. They find out no matter how secretively I try to contact you or even try to find out how you are doing. They always tell me how they would always do something to you. And I….” Saba began to sob at that point. Zayaan felt tears building up in his eyes too, as he heard a voice full of pain. But he was firm when he spoke.

 

“Well, they are paying for it now.” he said and Saba’s sobbing stopped at once.

 

“How?”

 

“They are both arrested by the police in New Zealand.”

 

“What? How? And why?!”

 

“Oh, I’m tired of explaining. Let’s skip that part, shall we?”

 

Zayaan said, taking a deep breath and smiling. Before giving Saba a chance to think, Zayaan went and hugged her so tight that it made her forget every single worry that she had.

 

“I missed you so much!” Zayaan said, hugging her even tighter.

 

“I missed you too.” Saba said in a low voice, then smiling the first time after a long time.

 

**2 years later**

 

It was a chilly morning in New Zealand when a black Tesla cruised along a highway that passed through a green grass carpet overlooking the ginormous grey mountains with their tips covered in snow. The Tesla went at a regular speed as it reached a juncture on the highway that led to two roads. The driver in the Tesla steered the steering wheel to the right thereby taking the car in the direction that seemed to be heading to a forest.

 

Unlike the long-forgotten days, it was not silence that filled inside the Tesla. Rather it was jokes and laughter.

 

“I swear this was the thousandth time our dads have asked about when we are going to give them grandchildren.” Zayaan said as he drove.

 

“I know right? Time to rub THE statement on their faces again!” Saba said as they looked at each other.

 

“When Allah Wills!” they said in unison and they smiled by the end.

 

“To be honest I’m okay with waiting. But I do make dua to have a son. Because I want a tiny human just like you!” Saba said with a bright smile. The scar on the side of her face was almost invisible now. Perhaps because of how her health, both physical and mental had improved over the past years.

 

“Well, we are contradicting in our duas then. I’m making dua to have a daughter just like you!” Zayaan said, pouting his lips.

 

“Mmm hmm? Let’s see who wins!” Saba said, narrowing her eyes before she laughed with Zayaan.

 

Just then, the sound of Zayaan’s ringtone echoed in the car. Seeing a Nigerian number on the screen, Saba said that it must be Hamadh before receiving the call.

 

“Salaam Hamadh….. How is everything?” Saba asked.

 

“Hi sissy….is uncle Zayaan with you? Wanted to talk to both of you before I went to visit Dad. Do you have a message for him?” Hamadh asked with his deepened voice.

 

Zayaan and Saba exchanged looks as they recollected what had happened with Hamadh’s father Saahil. After they came back to New Zealand, they came to know that the one behind Sinaah confessing everything to the police was actually Saahil.

 

When Zayaan and Saba went to visit Sinaah in prison, he had told them that Saahil had wanted to harm Zayaan in the beginning. Especially after he got to know that his father had given permission to Saba to marry someone outside of her ethnicity when he wasn’t given the chance. But later when he heard that Saba left everything and went back to Nigeria for Heena and re-united Hamadh with his mother, Saahil had changed a lot. As soon as he got to know that Heena had even gotten better because of Saba, Saahil had told Sinaah to confess everything and fix everything for Saba and Zayaan. Even he himself had handed himself over to the Nigerian police force not long after that. He is now serving his sentence in prison and is regularly visited by his son and wife. Every time they visit, Saahil would ask about Saba and Zayaan.

 

“Send him lots of love from us, Hamadh.” Zayaan said, remembering all of it.

 

“Yes….and tell him that we will visit him soon In Sha Allah. Tell him to improve his behaviour even more so that his sentence shortens, and he is out of there once we get to Nigeria.” Saba said, with hope.

 

“I will In Sha Allah. Mama wants to say something, sissy.” Hamadh said. And then came Heena’s voice.

 

“Hey Saba! So did your mother-in-law like that traditional Pakistani dessert?” she asked.

 

“Oh that! Yes, she did. But she said that it was too sweet. Why don’t you send me the recipe with precise quantities of the ingredients?” Saba said.

 

“Of course I will. Gotta go now! Bye!” Heena said and the call got disconnected.

 

Saba sighed and smiled as she remembered how Zeenath had tasted and liked the dessert she had made for her.

 

Zeenath had not been on her right mind ever since she got arrested two years ago. She was taken out of the prison to a psychiatric hospital because her condition had worsened. She had lost much of her memories and it was only Zayaan and Farooq she got to know so far. Saba has maintained a distance, as the doctor warned that Zeenath’s hatred towards her ethnicity might worsen her condition. She speaks ill about black people even in random conversations.

 

But Saba still believed that it might change. And this was why she was trying to build a relationship with her even from a distance. Zeenath was told after she had that dessert that it was a black woman who gifted it to her. Surprisingly, she took that positively and said, ‘she must be good.’ Saba smiled as she heard those words from outside the room. She had forgiven her, despite the remnants of the hurt she gave remained in her heart.

 

“We are almost there.” Zayaan’s words took her back to the present moment. Saba looked outside as Zayaan drove into the narrow path inside the forest.

 

Within a few minutes of driving, Zayaan parked the car near the trees and they both got out of the car. It was none other than that spot. Their spot. Where there was the soothing sound of the waterfalls mixed with the sound of leaves rustling with the incredible scenes of water flowing from the gigantic mountains into the flowing river.

 

They both held hands as they walked towards the river. Zayaan held Saba close and Saba rested her head on his shoulder as they enjoyed the view.

 

“I love you.” Zayaan said.

 

“I love you too.” Saba said, and smiles appeared on both of their faces.

 

The end 🙂 

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“I…. I don’t think so Zayaan. My father just said that your father called him asking for help to get an attorney. Apparently, your mother is getting arrested for having involved with a criminal.” Aleesha said, leaving Zayaan in shock.

 

“What?” Zayaan blurted out in disbelief.

 

“Yes….. I will text you Heena’s address. I need to get going right now.” Aleesha said in a rush and the call disconnected.

 

Zayaan picked up his phone from the desk with his shaky hand. At once, he called his father. The phone kept ringing until Zayaan thought his father won’t be picking up. Nonetheless, his answered just as he was about to give up hope.

 

“H..hello…” his father’s voice was jagged.

 

“Dad…. what’s going on at home? Where is mom?!” Zayaan asked.

 

There was no answer from the other end.

 

“Dad, are you there? Is mom still at home?” Zayaan asked again.

 

Again, no answer.

 

“Dad please answer me….is mom taken-“

 

“Stop talking about that devil of a woman!!!” his father’s voice came out as a scream this time, startling him.

 

He never heard his father talking about his mother that way until that moment. So, he was too stunned to be able to say anything.

 

“She betrayed me and broke our trust! I told her to do everything she can to bring Saba back to you when you were bedridden. It was only when I saw you in that condition that I realized that we were doing wrong to you by going against your marriage. And today I get to know that you were in a coma for months is because of her doing!” Zayaan heard the pain in his father’s voice as he spoke. He tried hard not to imagine the state his father was in because it was too much for him to bear. His father spoke again, as he was at a loss for words.

 

“I am so sorry, son. I never wanted to see you in pain. The only reason why I wanted to keep Saba away from is because I thought you could find a better match. But today I realize how much that girl loves you. The only reason why she walked away from you was to keep you safe.” Farooq said and Zayaan’s heart skipped a beat with those words. For a moment, he thought that his father was talking about today.

 

“How do you know, Dad?” Zayaan asked.

 

**

 

The next morning, Zayaan was a driving a car that he rented across a highway in Lagos State. His father’s words kept ringing in his head as he drove with his heart hammering against his chest.

 

“Her youngest brother was finally caught by the police in the investigation of the last crime he committed in the luxury building. Apparently, it was Zeenath who sent him there and even reported him to the police. Because the woman wanted him to stop blackmailing her about how he was going to report her. She didn’t think that he will have evidence against her. She underestimated him and got him caught by the police. And as a revenge, the criminal gave the recordings of the conversations he had with Zeenath to the police.”

 

 

He also gave the details of what Zeenath had done to Saba. She had forced Saba to stay in hiding even in Nigeria. She in fact tried to kill Saba through a fire incident at a train station in Nigeria. Sinaah said that she got contact numbers of some of his friends who might do such a thing. And he said that one of those friends revealed to him very recently about her intentions. Apparently, she had a plan of calling Saba to blackmail her. She was that afraid that Saba might reveal the truth to everyone….”

 

“Did she die in that incident? S…Saba?”

 

 

Zayaan had interrupted his father’s words to ask the question he desperately wanted to ask. As devastated as he felt about what happened to his mother, his heart fluttered as he remembered the rest of the things his father said.

 

“Actually Zayaan, there is a chance that she might be alive. Sinaah said that Zeenath wanted Saba to disappear, even if she didn’t die. She had wanted others to believe that she was dead. So, it could be that Saba is still living in hiding because of Zeenath’s blackmailing. Find out where she is Zayaan, she might still be alive.” his father had said.

 

A smile involuntarily appeared on his lips as those last words echoed in his head. A sigh escaped from his mouth as his smile grew wider. The mere thought of seeing Saba again filled his heart with happiness. He stepped on the accelerator as he remembered that he was heading a direction that would take him closer to her.

 

After a few hours of driving, Zayaan parked his car near one of the houses in the countryside as the GPS directed him. He looked to the right and saw a small house built with planks of wood. The design of the house and the flowerpots all around the house reminded him of the house he had shared with Saba.

 

Zayaan stepped out of the car and looked towards the house even as he closed the door. As he was about to take a step forward, he heard a familiar voice from inside the house.

 

“Mama let’s hurry up! They are going to run out of my favourite bread.” it was none other than Hamadh, who opened the front door and came running down the small staircase. He stopped in his tracks when his eyes met with Zayaan’s. Zayaan smiled, seeing how Hamadh had gotten a bit taller than before.

 

“Whoa! Look who is almost about to reach my height.” Zayaan said, going closer to Hamadh.

 

“Uncle Zayaan…” Hamadh said, still looking at Zayaan and in shock.

 

“Who is it Hama-“ the woman who was coming out of the house stood still too, when she saw Zayaan. An uncomfortable silence overtook the surrounding and Zayaan was the first one to break it.

 

“Well first of all, let’s get you the bread Hamadh. Would you like a ride with Uncle Zayaan?” Zayaan said with a smile. Hamadh looked back at his mother who nodded to give him permission. He then followed Zayaan to get into the car.

 

There was silence in the entire trip to the bakery and back to home. Zayaan had a feeling that Hamadh did not speak to him perhaps because of the sadness of losing his loving sister. Hence, he didn’t ask Hamadh anything and waited until he met Heena.

 

Heena had made tea for both him and Hamadh when they reached her home. Hamadh went to the dining room for breakfast while Heena set Zayaan’s tea in the living room before sitting across him on an old sofa.

 

Zayaan was about to ask Heena about her health as he took a sip from the tea, but she spoke before that.

 

“Saba used to show your pictures and talk about you a lot, so I know who you are.” Heena said and Zayaan felt a shiver down his spine, as he heard about Saba. He kept his cup on the table as he felt a tremble in his hands.

 

“She used to laugh and then cry when she talked about you. She told me about how you met each other, how you took care of her, how you showed love to her. She told me about how much she loved you too. Then she would cry every time as she repeatedly told me about how you were in a coma when she left you. And there was no way for her to find out about how you were as your mother would never reply to her messages. And your mother blackmailed her of the worst every time she tried to contact her or your father. She cried for days on end and she barely slept or ate…..Saba had come here to help me out. She reunited me with my son, found me a donor and used her savings for my surgery along with Aleesha’s help. But there was no way for me to help her and that broke my heart every time I saw her.” Heena tried her best to hold back her tears as she talked about Saba.

 

Zayaan sat there too, with pain growing in his chest, not being able to say a word or look up.

 

“And if that wasn’t enough, your mother ended up killing her! I will say this till the day I die even if it doesn’t get proven because I clearly heard the call your mother made. She told Saba that she would die the same way her mother did. And Saba had gone to a store at the station while she was on a call with your mother. Don’t you dare tell me that it was a coincidence that the fire started in that exact store just a little while after Saba went i-” Heena said in rage.

 

“My mother is being punished for her crimes.” Zayaan said quickly, trying to get a hold on his emotions.

 

“What?” Heena said, suddenly having calmed down.

 

“She was arrested yesterday as she was involved with one of Saba’s brothers. Saba’s brother testified against her so now she is being investigated.” Zayaan said with a heaviness in his heart as he imagined his mother’s state.

 

“Saba’s brother? Why would any of them do that though?” Heena asked, hesitant to believe what she had just heard.

 

“My father said that it’s because my mother kept blackmailing them that she would report them.”

 

“I see….I’m glad they did the right thing at least once.” Heena said, fully knowing that the three brothers always do as per the decisions of the eldest one.

 

Heena said and silence fell in the room again. Zayaan sighed and waited a little bit to frame the question she was about to ask in an appropriate way. He spoke when he figured it out.

 

“When Saba was with you, did she talk about Lagos Forensic Center by any chance?” Zayaan asked.

 

“La….yes of course. She had gotten a scholarship from a university to study forensics, and she always said she would work at the Lagos center once she graduated. Why do you ask?” Heena asked and suddenly, the pain in Zayaan’s chest vanished.

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Saba sat on a chair at the departure as the announcements were made about the boarding of the upcoming flight. She stayed seated, knowing that it wasn’t her flight yet. Aleesha and Hamadh sat a couple of seats away from her as they both realized that Saba needed some space after she had come out of Zayaan’s house.

 

She hadn’t spoken a word in the entire half an hour-long trip to the airport and Aleesha stopped Hamadh from asking any questions. Aleesha was worried about Saba though, as she saw her wiping her tears even as she sat in the departure. Something told her that it would take Saba a lot to come to terms with the decision she had made.

 

Aleesha’s hunch wasn’t wrong. Saba was looking at a picture of her and Zayaan even then from her phone. Her heart ached as she remembered all the memories, she had shared with him. Even more so as she remembered what she got to know that day.

 

I didn’t tell you to cause an accident with a ginormous truck that would kill my son. You are done for, you criminal Sinaah Sameer!

 

Zeenath’s words echoed in her head. She was almost about to forget about them when she came out from Zayaan’s room. She heard his parents talking in the living room.

 

I told you it was only Saba. I allowed her in because Zayaan may want to meet her even though he isn’t conscious right now. What kind of a conversation did you have on the phone that you didn’t want Saba to know?

 

Farooq said those words as Saba reached their view. Farooq was the first to look at her and that was followed by a shocked look from Zeenath. Farooq was about to say something when Zeenath spoke.

 

Farooq could you give us a moment?

 

Zeenath had said, still looking at Saba. Farooq looked back and forth from Zeenath to Saba before sighing and walking away from Zeenath towards Zayaan’s room. When Farooq entered the room, Saba could not hide the anger that showed up on her face.

 

So, you heard it, didn’t you?

 

Zeenath said before coming face to face with her.

 

If you say a word about this, I will make sure you and your entire family suffers for your entire life!

 

She had said, leaving Saba shaken.

 

Saba heard the announcements from the airport saying that now the flight from New Zealand to Nigeria will be boarding. Saba wiped her wet eyes one last time before standing up to go. As she began to walk, she realized that she wasn’t just walking away from New Zealand. She was walking away from a life that made her so happy.

 

But she knew that it was for the best. It was best for her to leave Zayaan though it broke her heart. As she walked out of the airport, she made dua for Zayaan’s recovery. She made dua that he gets the happiness that he deserves. Saba didn’t realize at that moment that the happiness Zayaan will look for the moment he wakes up would be her.

 

 

**

 

About a couple of years later, Saba was sure about that fact as she sat on her bed, the moment she walked into the hotel room she was in after her duty that day. She sat still as she remembered what happened that day. She reminisced how she had seen Zayaan as she was about to get into the van. How he had taken a picture of hers. How that had reminded her of the first day they met. How she had seen Zayaan about to follow the van even as it drove away. And finally, how she had seen him waiting outside the forensic center just for her to return and then fell on his knees when he didn’t see her.

 

She had gotten to know that he had come to look for her from the receptionist who called her while she was still on an investigation. At once, Saba called one of her co-workers to replace her. That was her first instinct. Because she knew the consequences of Zayaan meeting her. If only she hadn’t seen the real evilness of Zeenath at the train station a year ago, she could have assumed better about the situation. She could have assumed that Zayaan’s mother may have changed her mind for her son’s sake. But there was no way Saba could think that way anymore. Not after the way she behaved at the train station on that day. She’d rather keep Zayaan safe by keeping distance. And her heart kept telling her that Zayaan deserved better than her.

 

Saba looked towards the dresser as that thought crossed her mind. She was still wearing the mask from work as she began to walk towards the mirror on the dresser. As she stopped in front of the mirror, she slowly took of her mask. She still had her smooth and glowing black skin, except a burnt scar ran down her right cheek till the jawline.

 

I told you to marry a beautiful girl from your ethnicity and to be happy. Why did you have to come here?

 

Saba complained in her heart as a tear came rolling down her cheeks.

 

**

 

Zayaan sat in his hotel room too, except he was on the floor near the bed. He was still looking at the picture he took that day, unable to believe that it wasn’t Saba.

 

At that moment, he was looking at the eyes of the woman in the picture and he compared it with the eyes of the woman he saw in the evening. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he couldn’t have been wrong. The eye shape and even the eye colours of those two women were different.

 

Zayaan sighed and finally got up with the determination of finding out further. Even if this leads him to a place where people might consider him insane. Without any delays, he transferred the picture on his camera to his laptop. He then sent the picture to Aleesha and gave her a call.

 

“Salaam Aleesha, I hope I’m not disturbing you, but can you please check the picture I mailed you just now?” Zayaan spoke as he kept the call on speaker.

 

“I’m looking at it Zayaan… where did you take this picture? She really does strikingly look like Saba!” Aleesha said.

 

“I know right! It’s a woman who works at the Lagos State Forensic center. Who else it could be, right? But I think she is trying to hide from me. And I’m going to find that out myself. Didn’t you tell me that she lived with Heena in Nigeria? Please send me the address. I’m in Nigeria right now and I could go there.” Zayaan spoke without a pause as he was relieved to know that finally someone believed in him.

 

“Yeah I can send you the address. But I don’t think you will find her there Zayaan. Even Heena and Hamadh witnessed the burying of her dead body.” Aleesha said.

 

“I said I’m not gonna believe that has happened. Not until…..until at least I’ve done everything I can. Please send me the address. I’ll ask around to get some clues.” Zayaan said, trying his best to stay collected.

 

“Okay Zayaan. Here is the add….. just a moment.” Aleesha said and her dialogue cut off someone else talking in the background. The sound didn’t appear clearly to Zayaan so he spoke when he thought the dialogue in the background ended.

 

“Is everything okay?” Zayaan asked.

 

“I…. I don’t think so Zayaan. My father just said that your father called him asking for help to get an attorney. Apparently, your mother is getting arrested for having involved with a criminal.” Aleesha said, leaving Zayaan in shock.

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“Hi, my name is Aleesha. And….. you must be Saba, if I’m not wrong.” the young lady said, as she held out her hand for Saba to shake.

 

“Hi…please come in…. how can I help you?” Saba said, as she showed Aleesha the way into her house. Aleesha came in, with a smile and sat on the couch Saba pointed for her.

 

“This house is as cozy as I thought it would be.” Aleesha said as Saba sat across from her.

 

“I’m sorry but, I don’t happen to know you. Are you perhaps acquainted with my father?” Saba asked.

 

“Well, what if I said I’m acquainted with both you and your father and perhaps even your family?” Aleesha asked and that took Saba by surprise.

 

Saba was too dumbfounded to say anything so Aleesha spoke again.

 

“Listen to what I’m about to say very carefully Saba. And I really hope you will believe what I say because I will be showing you evidences.” Aleesha said and then again Saba had a hard time comprehending the situation she was in. How can a girl who looked like a Pakistani have met her and her whole family without her knowing?

 

Saba tried hard to remember from where she could have seen that girl but to no avail. She just sat there when Aleesha swiped and tapped on her phone and finally turned its screen to show her. At a glance, she saw a fair-toned woman and a black man who looked familiar to her. There was also a small boy along with them smiling for the picture.

Aleesha urged her to take the phone and look carefully. Saba did as she was told, and her hand went to her mouth as her jaw dropped. It was none other than Hamadh, standing near the couple, smiling at the camera. Saba could not help but look at the man in the picture as he too, looked familiar. Before long, she realized that it was her eldest brother Saahil.

 

“Your brother had married a friend of mine from Pakistan. Her name is Heena. Heena met Saahil in Australia. When they first met, Heena didn’t know that Saahil was into drug dealing and other crimes. He lied to her about having a big business. And he even owned a grocery store in Australia that got famous in the neighborhood they lived. That was perhaps to lure Heena or maybe he really wanted to be a better person for her.

 

Eventually, they get married and Heena moves to Nigeria along with Saahil. Things get tough for them from there. It was perhaps because Saahil was trying to give up drug dealing and other sources of black money. Heena told me about how there were people trying to get their debt from him. She also worked in a cooperate office, but the income was not enough especially after she conceived Hamadh. Saahil then tried contacting his father to get some help. However….. your father didn’t accept his marriage to Heena….” Aleesha said, looking down not wanting to make eye contact with Saba.

 

“What?” Saba managed to ask in a whisper, trying to digest everything that she was hearing.

 

“Yes….. believe it or not this is the truth. It was devastating for both Heena and Saahil to know that the father won’t accept them. Things began to go downhill from there. As a result of Saahil not getting any help from his father, he turns bitter and goes back to his crimes to earn money. In the beginning his crimes are hidden from Heena. But eventually Heena gets to know that he had even resumed doing drugs. Hamadh was only 3 then. Heena had then sought my help financially. She didn’t tell me about the abuse she was facing then. She didn’t tell anyone. Even I didn’t know until I went to Nigeria myself in my vacation and found out the state she was in. She was beaten up and crying her eyes out when I reached there. She said her 8-year-old son was kidnapped. And the kidnappers threatened her that it was Saahil who told them to do it so that she doesn’t hold back from giving more money to Saahil.

 

I tried to look for Hamadh, right from that moment. I informed the police and tried to find out for myself. But soon enough, I found out that Sinaah, your youngest brother had flown to New Zealand with Hamadh. Heena was devastated by the news. She was also terribly ill from then on. Not long after that, she was diagnosed with Leukemia. She didn’t have anyone to donate a liver for her so she is still extremely ill to this day. And she sent me here to look for her son, so that she could see him one last time. It took me quite a while to find out where Hamadh was but Alhamdhulillah I’m finally here.”

 

Aleesha said, looked around the house and sighed. Saba sat still, staring into space, and not knowing how to react. Silence fell in the room until they heard a boy sniffing from across the room. They turned to the right to see Hamadh crying while standing at the corner of the room. At once, they both stand up to go near Hamadh. Saba reaches him quicker than Aleesha, gets on her knees and holds his face.

 

“S..sissy. Is Mama ill? Is she going to die?” he asked in tears.

 

“No, my dear. In Sha Allah she will be alright. Sissy is going to make sure she gets better, okay?” Saba said reassuringly.

 

Just then, they heard the front door open, and it was none other than Sameer who walked in. He was taken aback, when he saw Saba and Hamadh crying along with an unknown girl standing there.

 

“What’s going on, Saba?” Sameer asked as he walked closer.

 

“Did you know about this, Dad?” Saba asked, standing up while still holding Hamadh’s shoulder.

 

“About what?” Sameer asked.

 

“About Heena. And Saahil. And that Hamadh is their son?” Saba said.

 

Sameer was once again stunned, upon hearing the names Saba mentioned. His shocked expression explained everything to Saba, even though he didn’t say a word.

 

“How did you know about them? And who are you?” Sameer asked Saba and then turned to Aleesha.

 

“That’s not important right now, Dad. What I want to know is why you hid this from me…..” Saba said in a firm voice. Sameer sighed and looked down. He spoke after a moment of silence.

 

“To be honest, I couldn’t tell you anything because of the guilt I felt. I didn’t know that me not approving of Saahil’s marriage would turn him worse and hurt his wife. I got to know everything from Sinaah who brought Hamadh to me. He said that there was no one to care for this little boy and that’s why he brought him here….”

 

“That’s what Uncle Sinaah told me too. He said he would take me to Mama once she gets better. But he said that if I talk about my family anywhere, he will not take me back so I didn’t say anything. Will he not take me back anymore now that I’ve talked about Mama?” Hamadh asked, still wiping his own tears.

 

“No Hamadh! We will make sure you meet your Mama In Sha Allah. And Uncle, please know that Sinaah was lying. His mother might be sick but she would have found one way or the other to care for Hamadh even without Saahil. Saahil kept Hamadh away from her so that he could blackmail her to give money.” Aleesha said and distress appeared on Sameer’s face.

 

“I…I didn’t know.” he said. Saba took a deep breath and spoke.

 

“Aleesha, I will go with you when you take Hamadh back to Nigeria. I want to apologize to Heena myself on behalf of my brother and….father.” Saba said the last word, looking at Sameer with moisture in her eyes. Sameer looked at her and didn’t say anything. Just as Saba said she will start packing and began to walk away, he called out to her. Saba stopped in her tracks.

 

“I do approve of your marriage to Zayaan. I was pleased with how he came to your life and showed you love. I didn’t want to repeat the same mistake I did in the past and that’s why I fully supported your marriage. So please continue living with him happily without feeling any pressure.” Sameer said in a shaken voice and tears rolled down Saba’s cheeks as she tightened her fist. The last sentence she heard reminded her of Zeenath. It reminded her of the warning she was given. And the way she had seen Zayaan being rushed into the ICU not long after she was given the warning.

 

All those thoughts were overlapped with what she just heard. About the fate of Heena and the state she was in. At that moment, Saba had to make one of the hardest decisions of her life.

 

“Actually…. No. I don’t want to continue living with him anymore. There are still people who aren’t happy with our relationship. And they could go to any extent to break our marriage. I would rather stay away from him, than see him getting hurt.” Saba said. Sameer called out to her, but she began to walk away without saying a word.

**

 

It was 4 in the evening 3 days later when Aleesha’s car parked a few blocks away from Farooq’s residence as Saba requested. Though they both were there in the car along with Hamadh, it was only Saba who got out of the car. They had their luggage in the trunk of the car, and they were on their way to the airport. But Saba wanted to see Zayaan one last time before she left.

 

Saba walked up to the house she was planning to go into. She sighed as she reached the gate and looked towards the house. She took a step forward towards the open gate when the front door opened. It was Farooq who was a bit stunned to see Saba.

 

“Saba?” Farooq said, standing at a distance.

 

“Salaam Dad. I came to meet Zayaan.” Saba said firmly, telling herself that she would be meeting Zayaan no matter how this conversation would go.

 

She had expected Farooq to pick a fight with her. But he didn’t. He sighed sadly instead, before he spoke.

 

“Of course, you can. Meeting you might do him good. I would do anything to have my son back on his feet again. The doctors say……anyway, go and meet him.” Farooq said, with pain in his eyes. Saba felt close to tears as she heard him. She began to walk towards the house at once, not wanting to delay her meeting with Zayaan even by a second.

 

Saba didn’t stop walking even after entering the house as her eyes were fixated on Zayaan’s room down the corridor she saw. But she was compelled to stop as she reached the door when she heard Zeenath talking from the dining room.

 

“I am going to sue you for this you ****! I clearly told you that it should be a small accident. And now the doctors are saying that there is no hope for my son!” Saba saw Zeenath screaming as she spoke on the phone at the dining table. Her eyes widened with the last words she said.

 

“I didn’t tell you to cause an accident with a ginormous truck that would kill my son. You are done for, you criminal Sinaah Sameer!” Zeenath shouted out a name that made Saba go weak in her knees. She ended up holding the doorknob near her to prevent herself from falling. That noise was heard by Zeenath who immediately turned back to see. At once, Saba opened the door to Zayaan’s room, got in and closed the door.

 

She had a moment of anxiety then, but it faded away when she saw Zayaan after so long. He was lying on his bed, eyes closed with an oxygen mask covering most part of his face. As she began to walk towards him, her sight blurred with tears. They rolled down her cheeks as she sat down on the bed and held Zayaan’s hand.

 

“I’m sorry, love. It’s all my fault. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be in this condition….” Saba said, beginning to sob and her tears out of control at that point.

 

“I really can’t be with you anymore. Knowing that it might do you more harm. I don’t want to take that risk. I love you too much to do that. So…….I’ll be leaving now. Don’t be too shocked if you don’t see me when you wake up. Just move on with your life, get married to a beautiful girl from your ethnicity, be safe and happy….” Saba talked to him through her tears.

 

She then paused to look at his face which was as still as it was during the night of the accident. Saba then took his hand and kissed gently before placing the hand back where it was and then keeping a note in that hand. She whispered the words ‘I love you’ before standing up and walking away. She didn’t realize that the moment she closed the door, tears rolled down from the edges of Zayaan’s eyes.

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“I’ll go and get it for you in a jiffy. Just wait for me little bit.” Zayaan told her as he caressed her cheeks and said ‘Love you’ before kissing her forehead and getting up to go.

 

Saba managed to smile at those small gestures, though she had gone through a severe crying episode just a little while ago. She almost forgot that she is had just been saved from a suicide attempt. That was the magic of his love, Saba thought as her smile widened when he gave her one last smile before leaving the room.

 

She sighed when she found herself on her own and tried to align her thoughts according to what Zayaan had told her. He was right. Even though she was having a hard time and none of her thoughts were making sense, this too will pass. She just needs to be patient through it until she gets some help.

 

Saba sat on the bed for a little while trying to silence her thoughts before she decided to lie down. As she was fixing her blanket, she heard the door of the room sliding which compelled her to look in that direction.

 

“Why are you back too soo-…” Saba began to speak with a smile assuming it must be Zayaan. But her voice caught in her throat when she saw a woman standing at the door.

 

“Mother?” Saba said as a shiver ran down her spine when she saw Zeenath coming towards her. Even though her mother-in-law gave approval for her to be married to Zayaan, Saba still felt distant from her. Not once did Saba feel accepted by her. Rather she always felt intimidated in her mother-in-law’s presence. It was the same even at that moment when she came by and sat on the chair near her bed with a smile.

 

“How are you, Saba?” Zeenath asked in a calm voice.

 

“I….um..good. Absolutely fine.” Saba said hesitantly to which Zeenath chuckled, leaving her confused.

 

“There is no way someone who just attempted a suicide could be absolutely fine within a few hours…” Zeenath said mockingly.

 

“You’re right. I may still need to see a psychiatrist. Had been doing well all these years until I was reminded of….. my past. But I will try to get better as soon as I can In Sha Allah. Zayaan encouraged me just now and I feel better now because of him. I don’t want him to worry too much because of me..-“

 

“Exactly! This is the reason why you should be out of his life! You are draining him with your all-awful life while all you do is get the emotional support you need from him. My son has been miserable ever since you came into his life. He doesn’t listen to us neither does he spend time with us because he has your problems to deal with. Our reputation among our friends have hit an all time low because you bewitched our son into marrying you. And now one of your criminal brothers is after him and God Knows what he will end up doing to him!”

 

Zeenath’s harsh words brought tears to Saba’s eyes. Saba couldn’t bring herself to even look up, until she heard the last sentence. With tears flowing down her cheeks, she looked at Zeenath in fear.

 

“How did you know about my brother? What did he say?” Saba asked in a unsteady voice.

 

“He has been blackmailing us for over a week now. Saying he will kill Zayaan if he doesn’t stop writing articles about them. We even informed the police but they haven’t caught him yet..”

 

“Wh…where is Zayaan right now? Please tell him-….”

 

Saba had to pause when they heard a siren of an ambulance from near the hospital. Zeenath said a cuss word and got up to go as if she was waiting for something like that to occur.

 

Saba felt breathless as she saw Zeenath opening the door and leaving abruptly. She quickly pulled the IV syringe out of her hand before getting of the bed and walking out of the room trying hard to get over the exhaustion that had overtaken her body.

 

Not long after she got out of her room, she saw a hospital bed being rushed towards the theater. As it passed by her, she saw Zayaan’s face and his head lying on a pillow red with blood. Not being able to believe what she saw, she shouted out his name and ran to catch up with the bed. But before she could reach, the bed was pushed through the doors of the theater and she came to a stop as the doors closed.

 

The next few hours were a complete blur for Saba. All she did was stand at the door of the operation theater, shedding tears for the pain her husband was in. The pain was made worse with the harsh words Zeenath was saying every then and now.

You did this to him!

What if he dies?

Thanks to your brother that now my son is close to death!

How are you going to pay for this?

 

Saba didn’t have a response to any of those statements. Rather she had agreed with most of those words in that state of helplessness. Once again, she was going to lose someone she loved because she said ‘no’ to what her brothers wanted. It was because of her that Zayaan was in such a condition. She hoped Zayaan would survive, unlike her mother. She desperately wished she would be able to at least apologize for what ‘she had done’ though she would never be able to forgive herself after this day.

 

After a 3-hour long surgery, Saba heard the news that Zayaan had gone into a coma and it was hard to say when or if he might wake up.

 

Saba began to weep when she heard the news. Her tears didn’t dry for days. She would beg to see Zayaan but Zeenath simply didn’t allow it hence even her father stopped her for even trying for the harsh words she was having to face just to see her husband.

 

She had only gotten a hang of herself a few months later with the help of a psychiatrist, medication, and lots of dua with the remembrance of Allah. She came to terms with the fact that Zayaan was in a coma and she couldn’t see him. She told herself that even in this decree of Allah, there might be something good though she couldn’t make sense of it. She made dua for Zayaan to wake up and his good health every single chance she got, and she would cry silently every time she remembered him. She knew somewhere deep in her heart that everything was going to fall into place. And that was exactly what was going to happen, though she didn’t realize.

 

It was a Saturday evening when there was a knock on the door of her father’s house. When Saba opened the door, it was an elegant looking young lady with a hijab.

 

“Hi, my name is Aleesha. And….. you must be Saba, if I’m not wrong.” the young lady said, as she held out her hand for Saba to shake.

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He took pictures of the police van and the house and he paused to look at the pictures he took. Right at that moment, a woman in an abaya, hijab and a mask walked out of the house towards the van. Zayaan lifted his camera up to take a better picture of the Nigerian police van. Without much thought, he clicked the picture and there was a flash of light. For some unknown reason, his heart skipped a beat at that moment. He looked at the picture he took and saw a woman near the van, looking straight at his camera. He then moved his gaze to the front, while holding his breath as his heart began thumping against his chest.

The woman stared at him, for what felt like an eternity. He looked deep into her eyes, knowing for sure that he knew her, and her eyes recognized him too. He held his breath and he felt like his heart came to a stop as he imagined her without the mask she was wearing. He was about to call her, when a group of 3 men and 1 woman came out of the house.

“Alright! We got all we need from here. Let’s get moving to the next location.” one of the men said and the woman who captured Zayaan’s attention looked away and slid the door of the van to get into it. Zayaan went out of breath in panic when he lost sight of her and involuntarily took a step towards the van.

But just then, Waleed called out to him from behind the others came to enter the van and quickly closed the doors. Before Zayaan knew it, the van came to life and it began to drive away.

“Saba…. Saba!” Zayaan first called out in a whisper and then out loud as he subconsciously started to run after it. But Waleed held on one of his arms before he could proceed further.

“Whoa! Where in the world are you going, sir? Taking pictures of the police van is suspicious. We should get going from here…” Waleed said.

“J..Just now…..who was the woman who looked at me?” Zayaan asked in a shaky voice.

“I don’t know, sir. Must be one from the forensic team. Do you happen to know her?” Waleed asked curiously.

“If I ask you, could you find out who she was?”

“Well yeah I guess she must be from the Lagos State Forensic center so…..”

“Let’s go!”

Zayaan said and proceeded to walk without even giving Waleed a chance to talk.

A little while later, they were both in a taxi driving towards Lagos State Forensic Center. Waleed was talking about how they may not give information about a certain employee but Zayaan was not hearing any of it. He kept remembering the eyes that were looking at him and knew for sure who it was. Every time that realization hit him, he inevitably smiled and couldn’t explain the reason why to Waleed who was asking him about it.

Zayaan’s smile grew wider, as they reached the forensic center and saw its name. It was her. It was surely her. She’s alive! Zayaan kept telling himself as he got out of the taxi and remembered Saba’s passion towards forensics. She was studying even after they got married and she was supposed to graduate in the fateful year that separated them.

Zayaan went walking straight into the center even before Waleed. He went to the reception and spoke even before the female receptionist could greet.

“I would like to ask you about an employee who is out right now in an investigation. She was near this district with 4 other employees. She wore an abaya and hijab and a mask. What’s her name?” Zayaan said, fidgeting and not being able to stay still.

“I’m sorry but a lot of our teams go to different locations and it would be difficult for us…”

“Here….. here is a picture of her. Could you please identify who she is?” Zayaan said, holding out his camera and showing the picture he clicked.

“I’m really sorry, sir. But there are several employees with this attire, and they usually wear masks when they go out to investigate. Besides, we cannot give the personal information of any employee to anyone without their permission.”

“But she…. “

“I… guess we can wait outside until the van comes back. Are we able to do that?” Waleed stepped in and asked the receptionist, while being apprehensive about the fact that Zayaan might cause a seen.

“I guess you can wait outside our building…..but not within our premises.”

“Okay….we will do that.” Zayaan said and began to walk out of there, leaving Waleed flabbergasted.

Waleed was only able to catch up with Zayaan at a restaurant near the forensic center. He sat at the table Zayaan was seated and was even more shocked to see him smiling as he flipped the pages of the menu.

Zayaan looked up at him with bright eyes and spoke at once.

“If I stay seated here, I would be able to see the vehicles entering the forensic center. If I see the van going in, I could go and check on her.” Zayaan said with an unwavering smile.

“Who is that woman sir? That you are so curious about?” Waleed asked. Zayaan looked at him and his smile faded just a little before he spoke.

“She is my wife…” Zayaan said in a calm voice, his smile reappearing and trying his best to hold back his tears.

Up until now he was only hoping that the woman could be Saba. But at this point, he was sure. He wasn’t doubting it even in the tiniest bit. He knows those eyes. And he knows her determination. No matter how many obstacles that may have come her way, she would have achieved her goals by now and she would be living her dream.

Finally this had come. This would be the day his longing will come to an end. He wouldn’t have to cry a single tear after this day. Zayaan thought to himself as he tried hard to ignore the fact that the woman had just left in the van without waiting for him. If it was Saba, why didn’t she wait for him? And why didn’t she try to contact him within the past two years if she was doing well and good? But Zayaan brushed these thoughts off his mind. And began to think about the moment he would be meeting Saba today.

Zayaan stayed at that table in the restaurant, almost the whole day. He only took breaks for prayers and every time he saw a van entering through the gates of the forensic center, he would go and see the employees getting out of it. The clock ticked and the sun almost set without him seeing the woman he was looking for. He died a little inside every time he didn’t see her from within the employees that returned.

“You should really head back to your hotel, sir. It’s getting dark and I think all of the employees have returned by now.” Waleed said to Zayaan, who was now seated at a bench near the restaurant. Zayaan had told his story to Waleed now and he too was sympathetic towards Zayaan.

“I can’t. If I go back now I would be losing hope. And I don’t think I have the strength to survive without the hope of her returning.” Zayaan said, almost in tears. Just then, they both looked towards the center as they saw a van entering through the gates. Zayaan stood up at once and paused a little before he began taking steps towards the center. He ran after some point and entered through the gates. He followed the van until it stopped near the building. The front doors opened and the door on the side slide open. From there, came out a girl in abaya and hijab and a black mask. Zayaan stopped in his tracks when he saw her, and then again began walking towards her. With a heart beating restlessly he went and held her by the arm.

“Saba!” he called out with a smile as he did so. His heart sunk a little as he felt that the woman he was holding was not Saba. Her height was different from the one he saw that morning. Her eyes were different too. They lacked the warmth he saw in the morning. Just as the realization hit him, the woman took off her mask.

“Who is this?” the stranger asked and Zayaan let go off her hand with as he let out a short breath.

“What’s going on?” Zayaan heard a man’s voice like the one he heard that morning and it was the same man he saw near that house. And so were the other employees that got out of the van. Then why was the woman standing in front of him at that moment, not the same one he saw before?

Was he out of his mind? That he was now seeing things that weren’t for real? At any rate he wasn’t seeing Saba that day. And he would have to go back to the miserable reality of thinking whether she was alive.

Zayaan broke down at that realization. He fell on his knees right then and there, bawling in tears not being able to handle himself. Waleed came running to help him.

Zayaan didn’t know that there was in fact a woman near the building in an abaya, hijab and a mask looking at him.

“I’m sorry….” Her eyes were wet with tears as she whispered those words.

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It was half past 5 in Nigeria when Zayaan’s flight landed on an international airport. Zayaan could not help but look around the place from the moment he got out of the flight. He kept on looking even as he took his luggage and began to walk out of the airport. His heart was constantly telling him that she could be anywhere, so he had to keep looking. And every moment even the thought that he may not find her at all crossed his mind, he felt a tightness in his chest that compelled him to think otherwise.

He was going to find her. He had to.

Zayaan looked out of the window of the taxi he got in from the airport as it drove on the streets of Lagos state. He was a bit sad as this wasn’t the state Saba had told him as her home.

“We used to live in Anambra. We had a small home which my father had rented before we moved abroad.”

Saba had told him before. He had always told her that one day they will visit Saba’s old place so that she could tell him more about her childhood memories.

Zayaan sighed as he remembered those happy moments. The laughter they shared, the smiles they exchanged and the love they showed one another. He wondered if they will ever have those moments again. And yet again, his heart gave a definite ‘yes’ as an answer to that question. There was no way he wasn’t going to find her after all the duas he made to Allah, Zayaan thought to himself.

Zayaan arrived at the hotel he was supposed to check in to, after about an hour of driving. It was a spacious room with a queen bed and other facilities a three-star hotel would have. Zayaan gave a call to Laaiq and manager James as soon as he arrived there and changed his clothes into a T-shirt and pants. He then stood at the balcony of that room that was on the 21st floor of the hotel and looked at the busy street right near the hotel and stared at the never-ending scene of lit buildings. Just as he was about to ask himself the question he obsessively thought about, his phone began to ring. It was his friend Fawaz, who worked as a policeman in their hometown in New Zealand.

Zayaan received the call in an instant when he remembered why Fawaz might be calling him.

“Hello Fawaz! Did you find out?!” Zayaan asked, as he held his breadth.

“Yes Zayaan. I investigated the number plate you told me about. The car’s original owner had sold it to someone else. I dug into it further and…..it was your mom who bought it Zayaan. She then…. are you sure ready to hear this, Zayaan?” Fawaz asked as he sighed.

“Yes….I’d rather know…” Zayaan said with difficulty, with moisture forming in his eyes, realizing that there was no easy way to face the news.

“It’s exactly how you suspected, my friend. Your mom had given it to the criminal who was involved at the crime scene a week ago. And from the investigations of your accident couple years ago, we suspect that he is the same criminal who caused the accident. He used to be a well-known criminal back then. Your mom…..may have paid him to do it.”

Zayaan’s eyes blurred with tears as he heard Fawaz breaking it to him. Fawaz began to say ‘hello’ and asking him if he was okay when he became completely silent. He was unable to say a word as a lump formed in his throat and he disconnected the call as he put his hand down when he felt as though all his energy was drained from him.

He then began to sob as the heartache that took over his chest compelled him to. He cried his heart out as he got on to his knees, trying to wrap his head around the fact that he was betrayed by his own mother. Other thoughts crossed his mind as he sat there crying. If she had done that to her own son, what could she have done to Saba?

Zayaan’s fists tightened as he thought about it. He was going to bring her to justice no matter what! His determination strengthened tenfold in that moment.

**

The next morning, Zayaan felt numb as he got ready to head out to work on his documentary on Nigerian festivals. He could not help but think about the news he had gotten the previous night about his mother. He was unable to pick up the phone when she’d called just as he woke up that morning and had texted saying that he was busy instead. He was busy, but he would have said it on the call if he hadn’t felt the heaviness in his heart towards his mother. He dearly wished his mother wouldn’t notice the distance he kept with the text and wouldn’t ask him about it any time soon.

Zayaan tried his best to stay away from the thoughts of his mother as he headed out of the hotel in a taxi with a tour guide. The tour guide assigned for Zayaan was a cheerful Muslim Nigerian young man named Waleed. Waleed talked to Zayaan about the different that take place in Nigeria especially in the State of Lagos at that time of the year.

“This area that I’m taking you to, is mostly a Muslim community. Eid al-Adh-haa is tomorrow. Would you like to document what they do to celebrate Eid?” Waleed asked.

“Of course!” Zayaan nodded with a smile and Waleed told the driver the direction to go.

The taxi stopped at a neighbourhood with small houses rather than the tall buildings in the city side. Zayaan got out of the taxi along with Waleed to see men, women and children busy decorating and passing food from one house to another.

“Would you look at that? This is the on-set of Eid celebrations around here. It begins with sharing breakfast with the neighbours and getting ready for slaughtering the animals. That’s going to happen sometime this afternoon. After slaughtering, all the neighbours are going to cook the meat together and share one big meal. That’s going to be quite a sight!” Waleed said as Zayaan began to take pictures and videos from the camera he brought.

He took pictures of the kids, the houses, the streets, the greetings, and the smiles as he listened to the details Waleed was giving him. He was completely lost in the scenery until he saw something strange as he walked down the street. There was a police van with a label ‘forensic investigation’ near one of the houses.

“There was a murder case in this house a few days ago and the police are still investigating the case. Sad for this family that they have to go through this during the Eid celebrations.” Waleed talked while Zayaan, as usual began to take pictures. He took pictures of the police van and the house and he paused to look at the pictures he took. Right at that moment, a woman in an abaya, hijab and a mask walked out of the house towards the van. Zayaan lifted his camera up to take a better picture of the Nigerian police van. Without much thought, he clicked the picture and there was a flash of light. For some unknown reason, his heart skipped a beat at that moment. He looked at the picture he took and saw a woman near the van, looking straight at his camera. He then moved his gaze to the front, while holding his breath as his heart began thumping against his chest.

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Zayaan was busy packing his bag early morning a week after he had covered the crime scene that happened at the luxury building. The criminal was yet to be found and the investigators were still working on the case.

Zayaan was as curious about the criminal as those investigators and the policemen or perhaps even more. He was thinking about how he was lied to by his mother that day when he had asked about the car that he had seen at the crime scene.

“But doesn’t Mariyam have a blue Audi?” his father had asked after his mother’s hesitant answer.

“She does! But you see it was white before. You mustn’t remember since you hadn’t seen it much, Farooq! Hehe…” his mother said, trying her best to cover her nervousness with laughter.

“I see…” his father had said, lost in thoughts and the conversation had ended there.

Zayaan had a lot more to add to that conversation now that he had called Aunt Mariyam and cleared out about any change in the colour of her car. He had wanted to confront his mother a dozen times in the past week but couldn’t bring himself to. Or maybe he was in a rush to prove something even more important to everyone with the trip he was getting ready to go on.

Zayaan was about to close the suitcase on his bed when he heard a knock on the door.

“Come in!” Zayaan said as he closed the suitcase and zipped it up.

“Are you awake Zay….You flying somewhere? Right now?” Zeenath’s tone of voice changed when she noticed the suitcase.

“Yes I am. I’m going on a work trip. Didn’t Dad tell you?” Zayaan asked, a bit taken aback. He clearly remembered telling his father that he was going to Nigeria for work. His father was dumbfounded by the news too. He didn’t say anything and smiled at Zayaan, unlike Zayaan had expected.

“He didn’t tell me…. where are you going so suddenly?” Zeenath asked, arms crossed and evidently upset at both her son and husband for not telling her beforehand.

“It’s not sudden, mom. This was planned over a week ago at work…..I’m going to Nigeria.” Zayaan said the last words in a lowered voice, almost wishing his mother would not be able to hear what he said. Because he knew what was coming. And it was as he had expected. His mother stayed in a shock for a few seconds before she spoke.

“Y…..you can’t be serious right now? You are going to go to that country out of all the places in the world?!!!” Zeenath’s voice raised.

“Mom it wasn’t my plan. Manager James decided to assign me for that project!” Zayaan said, trying to defend himself.

“And you said yes to it without thinking twice? Why in the world would you want to go there?”

“As I’m saying mom it wasn’t my pla-..”

“You should have said no! In fact, call them and refuse to go right in this instant!”

“Mom I can’t bail out on them in the last minute. And what is making you want to stop me from going to that country so desperately? Is there perhaps something I shouldn’t find out from there?”

Zayaan finally asked suspiciously, and he saw his mother stopping herself abruptly as she was about to speak. The silence revealed much more than what he could have gotten from an answer that his mother would have given to the question he asked.

Zayaan felt utterly disgusted at even the thought. The thought that his mother may have hid a truth that he must have known a long time ago. As Zayaan began to nod his head, Zeenath spoke.

“Zayaan it’s not as you thi-…”

“I’m not even going to ask you anymore. Mom I really love and respect you. But what you are doing hurts me so much. I want to listen to you. But I don’t think I can stop myself from going there anymore. I can’t risk my wife being wronged in anyway because of my mother. Even if she…. isn’t around anymore, I will find out everything and ensure that she gets justice In Sha Allah!” Zayaan said, with moisture in his eyes and determination in his voice.

Zeenath kept on looking as Zayaan picked up his suitcase and headed out. Zeenath just stood there, not even being able to look back at Zayaan. She fell to her knees as she heard Zayaan opening the main door of the house and closing it behind him.

**

It was noon in Nigeria when a woman in dark blue abaya, a black shawl and a black mask covering her mouth and nose walked into Lagos State DNA forensic center. People around her kept looking at her as she seemed different with the mask she was wearing unlike the others.

“Who is that?” a new employee whispered to her senior she was working with.

“She is Ms. Cold-Stranger. That’s what we call her. Because she doesn’t really show her face to anyone and neither does she talk much to anyone around here. I think I heard someone call her Aaisha but most of us aren’t sure except for the higher-ups. She tends to ignore anyone who asks her any personal questions. And for some reason she always keeps that mask on, so we aren’t even sure what she looks like. Nonetheless, she is one of the finest forensicist we have here.” the senior lady explained.

“I see….” the new employee looked at ‘Ms. Cold-Stranger’ as she walked into the elevator.

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“Make sure you take the new camera to the crime scene. Boy did they make a mess!” Laaiq said to a crew member as he walked with Zayaan towards their company van that was waiting for them.

Zayaan wanted to ask more about the crime scene that they heard about just a few minutes ago but chose to be silent. He will find out when he goes anyway, he thought as he got into the van along with Laaiq and closed the door. This has been his thought pattern for over a year now since he had woken up from the coma.

His speaking got better with speech therapy, but he barely spoke at home, despite his doctors advising him otherwise. Laaiq was the only person he casually spoke to, occasionally, and that was what kept him sane. His parents try to talk to him during meals but Zayaan can’t bring himself to, while he realizes that Saba must have been hurt in one way or the other because of his parents. He had a deep resentment towards them yet tried his best to hide it. He ended up in tears every time they told him to ‘forget about her’ or ‘just move on with life’. He had a lot to respond with, but he always left the table, not wanting to fight with his parents.

The van began to move, and silence fell within it. Zayaan looked out the window and could not help but remember what Laaiq had told him a week ago. About a task he was assigned that needed to be carried out in Nigeria. There was only one question circling in his head.

Will he find her there?

For some reason, there was a ‘yes’ to that question deep inside his heart. He still couldn’t believe that Saba had passed away. Perhaps because of how suddenly he had gotten the news. Perhaps because he never got to see her, much less say goodbye to her before she passed away. Or maybe this was his gut feeling that was trying to save him from the betrayal of the people near him.

In the beginning, Zayaan had assumed that the hope of Saba returning to him was a coping mechanism his mind was using. But the more he thought about it, the more explanation he needed to be sure if Saba was no more.

“How can you be so sure that it was Saba, Aleesha? You said she didn’t even have Saba’s belongings. It could have been anyone!” Zayaan had spoken to Aleesha over the phone a month ago.

“But Zayaan, the body’s physique was just like Saba’s. She must have run without the belongings to escape. And we didn’t find her anywhere else after the incident. So, there was only one plausible explanation.”

Aleesha had said.

But Zayaan couldn’t believe those words. Especially because of how Aleesha said that Saba’s brothers have been out of the country ever since that incident.

Zayaan sighed as he went over that cycle of thoughts for the millionth time. He knew he had to find Saba. But he didn’t know where.

The company van reached its destination while Zayaan was still lost in thoughts. But he got a hold of himself as Laaiq slid the door and got out of the van. Laaiq was going to be covering the crime scene for the news while Zayaan was assigned to take photographs for the online news articles.

The crime scene was at a building that caught fire last night around midnight. The 20-story luxury white building had turned black from the middle. The fire had apparently started from the basement and there had been a robbery on the 5th floor before the fire happened. By the time the police reached the building to respond to the complaint, the building had already caught on fire. Investigators suspected that this was a trick that the robbers used not to get caught as the fire wasn’t that serious and it didn’t kill anyone. Even the tenants living on the fifth floor were able to escape without much injury.

Zayaan took pictures of the building as Laaiq was recording those details in front of the camera after interviewing policemen and investigators who were working there during that time. There was also a car near the building that was being investigated. The tenant who was robbed claimed that it was the car of the robber since he saw a man in a mask running away from the building towards that car. The tenant had thrown a tennis ball towards the car to prevent him from escaping and the ball had gone straight through the windshield of the car. The tenant said that the masked man had run in a different direction afterwards.

Zayaan looked at the car from the side and walked towards it to get a closer look. It was a white Audi and Zayaan had a feeling that he had seen it from somewhere. He took a picture of it from the front, where the windshield had cracked. He looked at the picture he took and just as he was about to look away, he noticed the number on the number plate. He instinctively began to think about where he saw it since he could have sworn that he had seen it somewhere.

Before long, he remembered a day from almost two years ago. The day when he was worried about Saba and had gone to his mother to ask for help. He had seen that car driving away from his house and when he had asked his mother, she had just said that it was an acquaintance.

Zayaan looked at the car in wonder, thinking to himself what kind of acquaintance his mother must have had with the owner of that car.

**

It was half past 4 in the evening when Zayaan was driving back home from work. He was planning on asking his mother about the car as soon as he arrived home but for some reason, he kept delaying it. Perhaps because of how his conscience was warning him about how hurt he might be if he found out that his mother was involved with a criminal. He found it hard to believe though he kept thinking about it.

“Is there anything worrying you, dear? You seem to have a lot on your mind.” Farooq asked as they sat at the dining table for dinner and the worried look remained on Zayaan’s face for a while.

“It’s…. I actually have a question for mom.” Zayaan re-directed the conversation.

“Wow! Did you hear that Farooq? My son has a question for me in such a long time! Go ahead, son. I’m all ears.” Zeenath said, with a wide smile. Zayaan saw his father looking at him with a sad smile too and realized the significance of what he had just done. He felt sad mostly for his father, as he’d realized his father may not have played much of a part in sending Saba away as his mother did. And now he had to confront his mother, on the day he spoke voluntarily to his parents after so long, instead of having a loving conversation with his father.

Regardless, Zayaan found the courage and spoke.

“Mom….. remember the white Audi that came to our house 2 years ago? I asked you who it was and you said it was an acquaintance. Who was it exactly?” Zayaan asked, intently looking at his mother for any sign. As he’d expected, nervousness took over her face.

“A white Audi? I think you are mistaken, son. We don’t know of anyone who has a white Audi, do we?” Farooq said, looking at Zeenath.

“W…we do. It’s Aunt Mariyam’s car.” Zeenath said nervously. Zayaan tightened his fist has he realized that his mother was lying. He’d seen Aunt Mariyam’s car and though it was an Audi, it was never white. His jaw tightened as his mother refused even when his father tried to make that argument.

Who could have his mother met that she was lying about it to this day? Something told him that it must be related to Saba.

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As the morning sun’s light touched Zayaan’s face and intensified within the few minutes after the sunrise, he opened his eyes slightly with great difficulty. His eyelashes were wet from the tears that had fallen because of a dream that he repetitively had in his sleep. The dream was so vivid that it almost felt real. And the number of times he saw it made him wonder about how long he had been asleep.

His mind instinctively replayed the scenes of the dream that were heartbreaking to him before starting to wonder about where he was. Suddenly, curiosity overtook his tears. He was not at the home he shared with his loving wife. He was in his room at his parent’s house.

He looked around and saw the machines, monitors and the IV stand next to him. Why were these next to him? He tried hard to remember. It took him a few seconds to remember the fateful day where Saba almost drowned herself. That’s right! He had taken Saba to the hospital. Then why was he lying down at home and not with Saba? Zayaan asked himself without even thinking further because of how worried he was about Saba.

Zayaan was almost about to get himself up when the doorknob of his room. He stopped trying because of how tired he felt and at the same time realizing that help was coming. It was his mother who came into the room. Zayaan wanted to speak but for some reason he couldn’t bring himself to. To his surprise, his mother’s eyes widened, and she placed a hand on her mouth in shock when she saw him.

“Farooq call the doctor! Zayaan is awake!!” his mother cried in a shaken voice. Her words left Zayaan in wonder. For how long was he unconscious?

Within a few minutes, Zayaan was being checked upon by a doctor and a couple of nurses. From their conversation, Zayaan got to know that he was in a coma for almost half a year. Those words reminded him of the accident he got into when he’d gone out of the hospital to get food for Saba.

Zayaan could not believe that half a year had passed since that incident. He remembered it like yesterday. If months had conceded after that day, where was Saba? Was she alright? Had she gotten over her trauma? Why wasn’t she there when he was bedridden all this time?

Tons of questions invaded his mind and not being able to ask any of them almost lead him to a panic attack. Thankfully, the doctor was able to handle his breathlessness with the oxygen mask in the room and told him that he should be able to speak within a few weeks along with speech therapy. His parents were told that his vitals were normal hence he should recover fully within around a month. Zayaan saw his parents smiling and thanking Allah at those words with tears in their eyes.

Zayaan too, was thankful that he gained consciousness, but he was too worried about Saba to be able to smile. He wondered why they weren’t even mentioning Saba in this critical moment. As Zayaan kept on looking, his parents came near him as the doctors and the nurses left the room.

“Are you feeling better now, Zayaan? Do give us a sign if you feel anything going wrong.” Farooq said standing on the left side of the bed while Zeenath came from the right and caressed Zayaan’s forehead.

“My little boy! Mom was so worried about you all this time. I’m so grateful that you made it.” Zeenath said in tears.

Zayaan desperately tried to speak words but was only able to get his voice out. His distress was evident on his face when Farooq spoke.

“Don’t try too hard, son. You’ve suffered from a brain injury in that accident which is making it difficult for you to speak…. Zeenath, I think he wants to know about her. We should tell him.” Farooq said, with a sad look that made Zayaan even more anxious.

At once, Zeenath’s facial expression turned into one with hatred and intense anger.

“Farooq leave us alone for a little bit.” Zeenath said, not looking at either of the people in the room. Farooq sighed and left the room and Zayaan looked his mother, desperately looking for an explanation.

Zeenath looked at him as soon as Farooq closed the door of the room. Zeenath could almost hear Zayaan asking ‘where is she?’ with the look on his face.

“She is no more, Zayaan.” Zeenath said. Zayaan’s breath came to a halt with those words. A mixture of fear and pain engulfed his heart when tears formed in his eyes.

“No need to grieve over her. She had left you just a few months after you went into coma. If you don’t believe me, here is the note she left you. She kept it in your hand, but we removed it for your physical therapy whilst in coma.” Zeenath said, showing the small, folded paper she took from near the pillow Zayaan was lying on.

“Zayaan, I really don’t think I can do this anymore. I’m sorry that I can’t be with you. I need to leave…. this is what she wrote. Don’t tell me this is not her handwriting because she wrote this one in this house, gave it to you and left!” Zeenath turned the paper around to show the writing to Zayaan. Zayaan looked at it in disbelief and was sure it was Saba’s handwriting. He was also sure that she must have had her reasons for leaving this note. She wouldn’t have left just because he was bedridden as his mother is suggesting. Zayaan wanted to ask the question but he wasn’t able to, and his mother continued to talk.

“She left for Nigeria with her father. A week after they left, there was a fire at a train station in Nigeria. We got to know from Aleesha that she died in that incident. Apparently Aleesha has an acquaintance with her sister-in-law. Aleesha said that she was too burnt for anyone to recognize her.” Zeenath filled in details that broke his heart into a million pieces.

It wasn’t obvious in the first few seconds from the outside. He just lay in bed, looking at the ceiling. But as the tears rolled down from the edges of his eyes, sadness took over his face and he began to cry, more bitterly than he ever did in his entire life.

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